I wrote a lot for my high school paper.

My favorite writer is Hunter Thompson.

I can write pretty much any kind of story.

I usually get $3 a word.

This will be an award-winning article.

Will you pay all my expenses?

I hope you won’t edit the style out of my story.

If I get sued, do you pay for the lawyer?

And then there’s this…

This isn’t the piece we talked about but I think you’ll like it.

I went a little over the word count on this one.

Please send along other things writers say that editors really don’t want to hear. Coming soon: 10 Things Writers Really Don’t Want to Hear from Editors.