From a conversation between New York Times columnists Gail Collins and Bret Stephens headlined “We Don’t Know What Will Happen Tuesday but We Do Know How We’ll Feel About It”:

Gail Collins: OK, Bret — it’s elections week! Tell me the one outcome you’re most hoping to see and the one you’re most dreading.

Bret Stephens: The idea of Herschel Walker being elected a United States senator is the political equivalent of E.L. James, the author of “Fifty Shades of Grey,” being awarded the Nobel Prize for literature: the preposterous elevation of the former equals the total debasement of the latter.