In this week’s Washington Post Style Invitational, the Empress Pat Myers asked:
In Week 1357 we asked for pickup lines to be said by particular people, or people in various professions. At least a dozen of you had a dentist offering to fill the person’s cavity, and a librarian “checking out” the desired one. More creative but also submitted by too many people: Houston Astro: Hey, baby, I already know your sign.
The winner:
Orthopedic surgeon: “What’s a joint like that doing in a nice girl like you?” (Alan Duxbury, Carlisle, Pa.)
Other good entries:
A plumber: “I’ll pick you up Friday night sometime between 6:30 and 9:45.” (Jesse Rifkin)
Sen. Mitch McConnell: “Let’s get down to the floor and get cozy—and don’t worry, there won’t be any witnesses.” (Hildy Zampella)
Auto mechanic: “It looks like you’ve got a lot of play in that rear end.” (Jon Gearhart)
Crossword constructor: “When you walked in, you turned 3 Down into 6 Across.” (Jesse Rifkin; Jon Gearhart)
Tax preparer: “You don’t need any help filling out your form.” (Ed Scarbrough)
Haiku poet: “A nightingale falls/ The wind empty in its wings/ Girl, you’re a brick house.” (Jeff Shirley)
Sen. Susan Collins: “Ask me out and I’ll give it serious thought for a few weeks before saying no.” (Chris Doyle)
NPR host: “Support for this proposition was provided by my Robert Wood Johnson Foundation.” (Duncan Stevens)
Jeff Bezos: “I’m Jeff Bezos.” (Stephen Dudzik)
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